Buy your christmas presents from my Etsy shop? Okay!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/79839899/harold-the-amigurumi-stuffed-animal?ref=hp_tt_yt
- My brain during the day: Potato, potato, ching chong tomato
- My brain at night: I wonder why the Earth was placed exactly here and allowed us to provide a perfect climate to sustain human life.
War hawk.
Every hour, I look at the clock.
When it the hand strikes two, it plays Bach.
I bought the clock from Bangkok while in search for an air sock.
En route, I walked pass a flocking war hawk.
He would squawk and gawk and talk baby talk.
He wore a dirty sock and an old lady’s smock.
For a living, he stocked caulk on the dock in Bangkok.
His house was a rock and his doors didn’t lock.
He died because his air flow was blocked due to insulin shock.
How I hear Sofia Vergara's Covergirl commercial:
- Sofia Vergara: BOARD WIDTH CHORE JUAN TRIC LIPSTIC? DEN LID A DUBBLE LIVE! WIDTH NU BLASS FLIPSTIC FROM CUPBOARDGERL. CREAMY COLLAR ON JUAN END, CHIMMERY COLLAR ON THE UTTER. SO YOU CAN FLEP CHORE LOOK FROM DA MANURE TO DAIRY. NU BLASS FLIPSTIC FROM CUPBOARDGERL.
- looking back at myself a year ago: how embarassing
- looking back at myself a month ago: how embarassing
- looking back at myself a week ago: how embarassing
- looking back at myself yesterday: how embarassing
- looking at myself right now: how embarassing
New idea
I’ve thought about lying
more than I’ve thought about dying.
“What if?” I ask myself sometimes,
“What if I were to commit some crimes?
What about starting a new life?
Would it cause too much strife?”
I often consider changing my name
and moving somewhere far and being ‘the new dame.’
I could pretend I’m showered with riches
and jewelry and art and friends that aren’t bitches.
- normal people flirting: you're pretty sexy, you should definitely give me your number so we can talk or text sometimes ;)
- me flirting: do you like lettuce?
